Shortcake with Vanilla Whipped Cream and Berries

A Joke

A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?"

"Fertilizer," the farmer replied.

"What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy.

"Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer.

"You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."

The Recipe

Shortcake

1 cup all-purpose flour

1 cup cake flour

4 tsp baking powder

1 tsp kosher salt

1 / 2 cup sugar + extra for topping

2 tbsp shortening

2 tbsp unsalted butter + 1 for topping

1 cup heavy cream

Preheat the oven to 450.

In a large metal mixing bowl, combine flour, baking powder and salt. Add butter and shortening, do not mix, and set this and a fork in the freezer for half an hour.

Cut the butter and shortening into the flour mixture with the frozen fork. Make a well in the middle of the flour mixture and pour in the heavy cream. Using a spatula, fold the cream into the flour until the dough just comes together.

Turn the dough out onto a floured surface. Fold the dough into itself a few times then pat the dough out till it is about 3 /4 of a inch thick. Using a 3” biscuit cutter, portion the shortcakes.

Remove to a parchment lined sheet pan. You will want to set them so the are gently touching sides. Brush the tops with melted butter and sprinkle with sugar. Bake at 450 for 10 to 15 min or until golden brown.

Split and top the bottom with berries and whipped cream. Place the top back on and repeat.

Vanilla Bean Whipped Cream

2 cups heavy cream

1 vanilla bean

1 / 3 cup sugar

Measure the cream into a medium size metal mixing bowl. Cut vanilla bean in half lengthwise and scrape most of the seeds into cream. Wisk the mixture to combine then set in the fridge for 2 to 3 hours.

Measure the sugar into a small zip top bag and add the vanilla bean and remaining seeds to the sugar. Seal the bag and rub the mixture together then set aside.

After the allotted time has passed, remove the vanilla bean from the sugar. Mix the cream on low while slowly adding the sugar. Once the sugar is added increase the speed to med-high and mix until stiff peaks are formed.

Berries

3 pints berries (whatever looks good)

1 /2 cup sugar

Wash Berries and slice the strawberries if there are any. Toss them with 1/2 cup of white sugar. Set aside. This is best done the day before. That will give the berries time to develop a nice syrup.

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Homemade Pasta Dough

Italian Pasta Diet...

1. You walka pasta da bakery.
2. You walka pasta da candy store.
3. You walka pasta da ice cream shop.
4. You walka pasta da table and fridge.

Homemade Pasta Dough

4 Cups Flour (500 Grams)

4 Eggs

1 Tsp Kosher Salt

Measure the flour and salt into a large mixing bowl, make a hole in the center and drop the eggs into it. Using a fork, wisk the eggs slowly into the flour. If the dough is too dry add a little water, if it is too wet add some flour.

Remove the dough from the bowl to a slightly floured surface. Knead the dough until you have achieved smooth dough. The goal is smooth dough that does not stick to your fingers.

Cut off about 1/8 of the dough and cover the rest with a damp towel.

It does not matter if you are using a pasta machine or hand rolling from this point on. The same basic steps are involved.

You will want to roll out the dough using the #1 setting on your machine or to about a ¼ an inch, lightly flour if necessary, fold over and repeat 6 to 8 times.

After this, you can roll the dough to your desired thickness and cut.

Boil right away or dry on a cooling rack and store in a zip top bag for up to a week.

Virgin Buffalo Wings

Is it my imagination, or do buffalo wings taste like chicken?

Virgin Buffalo Wings a.k.a. Grilled Celery

8 Stalks of Celery
2 Tbsp Olive Oil
1 Tbsp Tabasco + additional to taste
1/2 Tsp Kosher Salt
1/4 Tsp Pepper
2oz Crumbled Blue Cheese

Wash, trim and pat dry the celery. Add along with everything but the blue cheese to a zip top bag. Shake to coat and place in the fridge until it is time to grill. This will give the celery a chance to soak up some of the Tabasco flavor. A half hour to an hour should do nicely.

Get your grill going and find the hot zone. The goal is to get a nice bit of sear on each stalk without overcooking it. Your want enough crisp left that it will hold the blue cheese. This should only take 1 to 3 minutes per side over hot coals.

Remove from the grill once you have a nice char. Top with the crumbled blue cheese and a dash or two of Tabasco.